Why you should scrap your ‘type’
Must be six foot, successful, hold a graduate degree and an organic produce garden. Must not be overly-religious, overly-attached to his mother or overly-tattooed. Sound familiar? Chuck out that checklist and try something new! Don’t be afraid and most importantly don’t limit yourself – we need to stop being so picky. Even if such a man did exist that met all of our unrealistic demands he wouldn’t challenge you and what you are looking for may not be what you need anymore. In fact many women haven’t altered their ‘type’ checklist since about sixteen! We should alter what we look for as we grow so the man is in line with our new goals and lifestyle.
A brilliant man by the name of Albert Einstein once said that “The definition of insanity is doing something over and over again and expecting a different result”. Why are we dating the same sort of guy repetitively and expecting something new? If this ‘type’ isn’t having positive effects in your life, rethink, maybe you are dating the wrong type and you should date someone who is the antithesis of what you usually go for. Not only will this rid you of dating déjà vu but dating new kinds of people can help you experience a whole new world and the opportunity to grow as a person. An example of this is my friend Lucy. She was a quiet woman who always went for assertive extroverts. She is now dating a younger, shyer guy and finds freedom in the fact that she doesn’t rely on someone to speak up for her. This new-found assertiveness has enriched her life and ultimately helped her to discover that it doesn’t really matter so much about the man but whether you feel more comfortable in yourself around him.
A way of breaking out of your comfort zone that has gained momentum in recent years is that of dating a toyboy. Initially many women are skeptical but after meeting these toyboys on sites like Toyboy Warehouse they report feeling younger, learning more culturally and have a refreshed, more future-focused outlook on life. In comparison to their previous ‘types’ of men, these women feel more revitalised and renewed.
You might love it, you might even hate it and cement the fact that yes, you were right to avoid artists for example – deciding that they are in fact completely bat-sh*t crazy! But isn’t that what life is about? Learning through experiences and taking these risks?
Written by Sarah from Team TBW and published as part of our 30 Blogs for 30 Days campaign, aimed at challenging preconceptions about dating.
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