Talking to people is easy enough, but in the bedroom things tend to get a little harder, or at least they can be with the right dirty talk…

Yes, mouths can be used for other than foreplay in the bedroom, with equally stimulating results. Dirty talk can help break tension whilst maintaining and even increasing sexual arousal, and just like foreplay, it takes practise to make perfect.

“…there are soft and hard options to dirty talk…”

Talking dirty with a new sexual partner can be awkward, but awkward silences can be more of a mood killer. Certain words with certain people can ruin the romance in bed, as not everyone enjoys the finely tuned and polished scripts of pornography. Just like pornography, there are soft and hard options to dirty talk, and not everyone is ready to jump straight into the XXX talk. For instance the C-words are dirty talk standard issue, but not everyone feels comfortable using them, so try not to throw C-words about willy-nilly and choose your timing.

Encouragement: If you are enjoying whatever your partner is doing, tell them. Though groaning and the curling of toes are a good sign, giving a verbal affirmation of what your partner is doing is a good way to keep your toes curling.

Direction: It’s tough, but if you aren’t enjoying what your partner is doing, it’s better to make a subtle suggestion to do something you would much rather enjoy. We know our own bodies best, and our partners may need directions to our particular places of interest if they get a little lost.

Complimentary: Flattery will get you everywhere. Giving compliments in the bedroom helps bolster confidence in your partner if they’re self-conscious, and being naked around someone can make the most confident of people conscious of their body. Be flattering, tell them what you like about their body and why.

Command: Some people like to take charge in bed, and some people like to be taken charge of in bed. To get what you want in bed, instead of a subtle direction, sometimes a direct command will make your partner come to attention.

Being able to talk dirty doesn’t always come naturally to everyone, and the levels of dirtiness need to be taken step by step rather than leaping straight into the dirt.

Remember:

It’s good to be dirty, but it’s rude to talk with your mouth full.

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