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Older woman dating

Dating The Boss: Part 1

I’ve been going over my favourite music as background to thinking about a fun playlist aimed at younger men who fancy older women and vice-versa.  A few years back, a song entitled ‘Miss Independent ‘was released by the singer Ne-Yo.  You may remember it.

The lyrics were co-written by three men, Tor Erik Hermansen, Mikkel Eriksen and Shaffer Smith. Now even if you don’t like this musical style, I think these lyrics should be an anthem for every man who’s romantically attracted to sophisticated, poised and successful women with established high-flying careers. I don’t pretend to be among their number, but I do know a few women who are. They are an exquisite, elite rarity. However, the sentiments of the song apply equally to the growing numbers of strong, competent women with independent lives and jobs, not only the exceptional high-fliers.

I love the lyrics of the song and they got me thinking. They sum up the sexy magnetism such older women hold for younger men. She wants him but doesn’t need him. She can manage perfectly well without his help. She pays her own way and has purchased everything she owns. She is assertive and decisive, with clear priorities.  Her life is busy, ordered and stable and so is she!

Unfortunately, in my experience, many men, particularly but not exclusively older men, still find this idea very uncomfortable or even disturbing. They dislike seeing a woman in authority and feel that it’s somehow going against nature. They resent high achievers if they are female and will not recognise the innate talent and sheer hard work involved in reaching that level.  Somehow, they must automatically be in competition with any woman in a senior position.

What is the reaction of the young man in this song?  “Oh, I can’t compete with her, she’s better than me; she makes me feel inadequate so I’m going to belittle her”? Not a bit of it: he finds her simply breath-taking; awesome! Wow, this young man has both sense and high self-esteem!

He has no problems with the idea of dating an older, gorgeous career woman and so is free to follow his heart:

“I look at her and it makes me proud, there’s something about her…She got her own thing, that’s why I love her, ooh, the way she shines…” 

Trust the years

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