Cougar Tips: For Women Dating Toyboys
Whilst men have been dating younger women forever, a woman dating a younger man is still a relative novelty, a theme explored in new movie The Rebound starring Catherine Zeta Jones.
The term ‘Cougar’ has recently been coined which I’m not sure has helped as it has rather predatory connotations for older women ‘preying’ on young (read innocent) men. It’s a shame because there’s a lot to be said for the cougar dating a younger man.
As a frequent user of dating sites, I get contacted the most by 28 year olds. And on Toyboy Warehouse, it’s a rare thing to be contacted by anyone over the age of 30! I’m not sure I could bring myself to go that young, but certainly I could go up to 10 years younger.
But there is definitely growing acceptance of it and Julia MacMillan spotted this, founding a UK dating website in 2007 with a deliberately sassy, tongue-in-cheek name – ToyboyWarehouse.com (Julia is the CEO). Members abide by one simple rule: that women date men at least a year younger, and men date women at least a year older.
To celebrate the release of The Rebound on Friday, Julia has compiled the following Top Ten Tips on Dating a Younger Man…
1. Be you, and give yourself permission to date a younger man. So many women still have a lurking feeling that there’s something not quite right about it, or that a younger man would faint at the sight of them naked, don’t give in to that.
2. Let him be him. A lot younger men say that the reason they prefer dating an older woman is that girls their own age are always trying to turn them into someone else or get them to change in some way to fit in with a social stereotype
3. Treat him as an equal. Don’t treat him as your slave boy. Respect!
4. Take it in turns to take the lead. You may have lived longer than him and had more experience but he can teach you a few things too
5. Allow him to be a man. Allow him to show his manliness and show your appreciation
6. Give him his space. More than anything men hate women being clingy. Don’t bombard him with texts and calls and don’t start getting jealous!
7. Keep your own life going – no need to be joined at the hip as that’s what he’s trying to get away from
8. Never “keep” him – it’s a relationship of equals and you’re not his mother
9. If you find him desirable, show it frequently; never withhold
10. Laugh together and communicate – two biggies!