How I Started My Dating Life At Age 62
How I Started My Dating Life At Age 62
“Now if you told me I’d be going on a first date aged 62, I would’ve thought you were ridiculous. But there I was, meeting this charming man in a town in Southern France. With flowing wine and fireworks, it was as romantic as it could get. It was a night of nervous, giddy excitement akin to being a teenager again. After losing my partner of over 40 years and accepting a life being on my own, this evening was something I never thought I would be experience again. But there I was!”
Maya’s (not real name) story is one of tragic loss and an inspiring comeback. After losing the love of her life, Maya thought that would be her one and only experience of love. However, with help from some unlikely sources, she was introduced to a world of mature dating – one she never thought existed.
Meeting The Love Of My Life
“I first met Frank at a library at our college in the early 50’s. He caught my eye because he was dressed incredibly smartly, he looked so very handsome. I was staring at him across the library floor, when he looked up and caught my eye, I jolted my head away. I couldn’t see myself, but I’m pretty sure I was going red because he gave a little chuckle”.
“I saw him a few more times, at classes and at organised socials we had – every time I saw him he saw dressed like an absolute gentleman. And on one evening, to my surprise he came and talked to me. I remember thinking his voice was gentle and the way he spoke so well-mannered, I was like butter!”
“In a few short months, he asked to marry me at the steps of the library where I first saw him. To his dismay, I remember not saying yes. Granted, I really wanted to, the fact he asked me made ecstatic. But I actually told him I’d sleep on it, mostly because I wanted to ask my mother. Thankfully, she was more than happy and pleaded with me to say yes. One day later, I called him on the telephone and finally told him yes”.
“Losing the love of my life at aged 60 did hurt so much, but if I had the chance that wouldn’t stop me from going back and saying yes to him again. We had many lovely years together and three children. When I was 58 he was diagnosed with lung cancer and slowly deteriorated until he died a day after my 60th birthday”.
My Daughters’ Plot
“The first thing to hit you is the loneliness. Frank had been a part of my life for so long, the only man I had ever dated. When he was gone our home became so quiet. I had accepted that Frank will have been my only partner and that that chapter in my life had closed”.
“Of all things, it was table tennis that introduced me into the dating world. My two daughters was well aware of the hardship I had gone through over the last few years and how lonely I was in the recent months. They had told me on multiple occasions that I should try and get back out there and meet someone new, but at 60 years old I didn’t think that was something I could do. They took it upon themselves to try and do something about that, which I was completely oblivious about until they revealed their sneaky plot”.
“I’ve loved table tennis all my life, I started playing in my late twenties and competed in a number of competitions and did quite well. In my later years, I’m not as quick on the ball as I used to be, but I’ve always felt younger than my age and I love any chance to play. My daughters invited me to a bar a little out of town that offered table tennis, which I thought would be so much fun. However, when I arrived my daughters were nowhere to be seen. I called them but couldn’t get through, the only way they contacted me was a single line text saying ‘good luck’”.
“This handsome man aged late 50’s then came up to me and called me by my name, which I was taken aback by. The first impression I got was that he reminded me of my Frank, dressed so smartly but with a rugged, grey beard that made him look very modern. He smiled and explained what he had been told my by daughters, that they found him Toyboy Warehouse and asked if he would like to meet me for a ‘surprise date’”.
“I didn’t know what to think, I started to walk away, there was no way I was going to meet some stranger from the internet, no less go on a date with him. But he caught up to me and explained that he’s just a normal guy, that he’d love to play a few rounds of table tennis and if at any point I felt uncomfortable, I could leave. Just like my Frank, he spoke in such a smooth, polite way that I had to take him on his offer”.
“The evening was so much fun, he was terrible at table tennis but he made me laugh more than I had done in such a long time. We went on a bunch more dates together and despite it not working out long term, I remember having more fun that I thought I could possibly have again”.
“Tinges of guilt did creep up, that I was disrespecting Frank in some way. However it was my daughters that me realise that my age shouldn’t mean I had to be closed off from experiences such as these.”
A New World Of Dating
“They had opened my eyes to a world of dating, from then I tried to delve into as much as I could. With help from my daughters I started online dating, I went to singles evenings, I wanted to do it all”.
“It quickly became apparent that I was still young at heart and I wanted to date someone with the same energy. There were quite a lot of guys my age that had settled into a routine, so I lent towards guys slightly younger than me who still wanted to travel and experience the world. I don’t know if you’d call what I do cougar dating, but what I do know is younger guys are able to match my energy and thirst for adventure.
“The most magical evening was in the south of France, I was on vacation with my family and this steely fox of a man invited me to a vineyard he owns. If he asked just a few years ago, I wouldn’t have shyly declined but I remember shocking myself and telling him exactly what I said so many years ago: ‘I’ll think about it, let me sleep on it’. My daughters were the first to tell me that I was being silly, that he seems like a catch and I should take him up on his offer. The next time I saw him, I agreed to go on a date with him and it was the most wonderful evening. It was that night that I realised it had been a long time since I felt lonely”.
“It was on deciding to open up the world and let experiences happen, that my life around. I miss Frank everyday and that’ll never stop. However, if I realised anything it’s that my mature age is not a barrier. That my generation is still experiencing the world and meeting the most interesting of people. For me, it just took a bold step into something new”.
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