An Interview with Tina B. Tessina PhD – Dating Experts Month
Tell us about yourself. What makes you a dating/relationship expert?
I’m a licensed Marriage, Family and Child Therapist (Psychotherapist) with a PhD in Counseling Psychology. I’ve been in private practice since 1978, and I’m the author of 15 self-help books, published in 17 languages.
How does your approach differ from other experts?
I’ve been a pioneer in acknowledging and supporting alternative lifestyle relationships. I accept that people want to be together, and I help them understand what they need to know to keep their relationships healthy.
What are some of the biggest challenges/frustrations you see from the people you work with?
Finding a partner they can have a successful relationship with.
Using the dating process to actually figure out if the relationship can work.
Once committed, learning the skills that keep long-term relationships happy and healthy.
Member submitted question
I’m 49, female and recently divorced. I met my husband when I was a teenager so I’ve never really done the whole dating thing. Where do I start?
– Catherine, 49
Start by figuring out what interests you, what you’re passionate about, and go where other people are doing those things. Once you have found and gotten in with an appropriate group, finding someone to date becomes a lot easier, and you bypass a lot of the scarier aspects of dating.
Tell us about some of the projects/books/events you’re currently working on/just completed
“This book is all about preparing you — not just for confident and competent dating — but for a successful, loving, forever adult relationship. In today’s world, most of us need some kind of guidance. If you’re conflicted at all about dating…if you’ve ever had trouble meeting people, attracting the right people, or making good choices in love…I highly recommend you get this book so you can get the benefits of Dr. Romance’s expert advice right now.” Bobbi Palmer
“Dr. Romanance is your must-have wing woman to find true love. ” Amazon Customer
“They don’t call her “Dr. Romance” for nothing. She knows her stuff. Highly recommended book!” Amazon Review
“I have recommended Dr. Tessina’s books to counseling clients over the years, always with great success. This one, geared to unattached people, is filled with direct, clear words of wisdom. I recommend it highly.” Isadora Alman
Do you find any patterns with respect to what women are attracted to? What are the main things women are looking for in a man?
Women tend to look for security. They want to know they are loved, and that they won’t be betrayed. Security means different things to different women, and sometimes the idea of security is misguided.
Do you find any patterns with respect to what men are attracted to? What are the main things men are looking for in a woman?
Men are looking for acceptance. They want to be liked for who they are, they want sexual acceptance and no-hassle relationships.
Member submitted question
I’ve recently started an age-gap relationship with a woman who’s 15 years older than me. I haven’t told anyone about us yet and she’s getting annoyed, almost like I’m ashamed of her. I really like her but I just don’t know how my friends and family will react. What should I do?
– Marv, 30
Marv, if you love her, you have to be brave. 15 years is not an insurmountable age gap. Stop worrying so much about what other people think. They’ll get over it. Instead, focus on whether the relationship makes you happy. If it does, then let your friends and family know that. Most of them want you to be happy.
How can people connect with you on social?
Finally, what’s the one piece of advice you hold close to your heart?
A solid, loving relationship with your self is the basis for all good relationships. Start by connecting with you, and the rest will follow.