In an interview with radio shock-jock Howard Stern, Donald Trump discussed dating women and how important their age is.

In the newly released tape from a 2002 interview, Trump calls 30 ‘a perfect age’.

So, how about 35? The soon-to-be President of the US says, ‘What is it at 35? It’s called check-out time’.

It’s far from the first time Trump has made misogynistic and lewd comments on Howard Stern’s show. In a bizarre 2006 interview, the topic of Trump’s daughter, Ivanka Trump, and her ‘voluptuous’ figure came up. Stern asked Trump if he can call Ivanka “a piece of ass,” to which Trump responds “yeah”.

Other controversial instances on Stern’s show include a 2010 interview where, in reference to Tiger Wood’s affair, Trump rejected the idea people can suffer from ‘sexual addiction’. In a 2005 interview, Trump talked about sleeping with contestants of his beauty pageants when offered, saying’ as the owner of the pageant, it’s your obligation to do that’. He also joked about being allowed in the contestants changing rooms, ‘you see these incredible looking women, and so, I sort of get away with things like that’.

Our thoughts

Toyboy Warehouse has seen thousands of mature women date and have fantastic relationships, is it time we pack up and go home? Is it true that after 35 women can no longer date, that they have to resign themselves with ‘checking out’?

It’s pretty clear to see we have some reservations with the above questions. The sentiment behind Trump’s words isn’t anything new, older women are expected to resign themselves to invisibility, to not be seen when others weigh up their dating options – it’s a pretty awful superpower.

When in actuality this sound be the loudest years of women’s lives, where sexual and relationship freedom means any and all enjoyment can be found.

What’s your thoughts on Trump’s comments?

The post Donald Trump: A Woman Dating Over 35? Don’t Even Bother appeared first on Toyboy Warehouse.

In a first for Radio 4’s Desert Island Discs Minogue, 47, gave the choice of one of her eight tracks to her “new beau” and “huge fan” of the show, 28 year-old British actor Joshua Sasse.

“I would like to have a surprise from Josh,” she tells presenter Kirsty Young. “I don’t know what he has done, but I figured if I was a castaway on an island, I would like to know what someone else thought, particularly my love.” 

So, did the young Sasse show some sass? It would be so easy to flatter her with something from her back-catalogue. Something that tells her she’s just smart, or beautiful, or sexy.

But instead Sasse did something far smarter; he chose to appeal to her mind AND her heart. The son of the late Romantic poet Dominic Sasse, he created a sensually intimate gift. With only a simple accompaniment he reads to her ‘As I Look Up’, one of his father’s most erotic poems, which climaxes with;

“I would bend to press my eager face into your neck, where the secret flesh is furred like peaches behind a curtain of caramel scented curls. Without asking, I would pull you down with my devoted hands to express, my fluent tongue to endear. We would smear our mouths with ardent kisses and cry aloud from loving, as we lay beneath the arches of that careless wanton day.”

No wonder “I think I stopped breathing for half of that. Breathe, Minogue!” was her emotional response.

Gentlemen, the bar has been raised. While few woman would want such erotic lines to fill a first message on Toyboy Warehouse, picking something personally meaningful or poetic is enticing once dating’s begun. Older woman are sought for their intelligence and sensuality; appeal to that, and perhaps some “ardent kisses” will soon take YOUR breathe away.

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Many of the tweets were comments of support and congratulations from friends and fans of Fry – actor Robert Webb to television’s Dr Christian Jessen. Fry described himself as ‘Deeply touched’ at the admiration following his announcement.

As Guardian’s Hannah Jane Parkinson writes age-gap relationships are ‘great’, for reasons ranging from more interesting conversations, intellectualism and better sex. But as she notes they remain as a ‘perennial taboo’, something of disgust and dismay to many.

The older celebrity and younger toyboy match isn’t something new, and the response from Twitter only validates many preconceived ideas about such relationships. The pictures of tweed dressed, greying, older Fry next to Elliot Spencer’s typical boy-band good looks have graced a number of articles, frequently with the most unflattering picture being chosen. Take The Sun’s choice for example, where Spencer’s cold stare looks more like an impending murder over a loving relationship. While the difference isn’t something we can ignore, the pontifications about the in-and-outs of the couple’s relationship, how someone can live with such an age-gap, these are all sneered and judged at.

What’s wrong with age-gap relationships? writes Parkinson. The benefits for either partner – whether a freedom from a stale marriage or the experience of a more mature individual – are too compelling to condemn age-gap relationships as pointless, wrong or even perverse.

Fry has on occasion spoken about his depression and previous suicide attempts, but according to The Sun a friend of Stephen’s talked about his ‘new lust for life’ since meeting Elliot.

“We’ve got the old Stephen back. He has spoken about his problems in the past because he wants others suffering with depression and loneliness to know it can affect everyone.”

In July, Elliot spoke about how his relationship with Fry helped his self-esteem issues, tweeting “I had the confidence of a gnat when I met Mr Stephen Fry. Show him some respect – he’s the man.”

Fry’s National Treasure label isn’t something too many people would dispute. A beloved comedian, actor and television host, its difficult to find someone who doesn’t love at least one of his many projects. So when both Fry and Spencer talk about the joy their relationship has given them, the turning tide towards an acceptance of age-gap relationships is only inevitable.

When the taboo status will ever be removed is still an unknown. Fry and Spencer’s news has, for the most part, been received well. The pictures of the couple smiling should act less as a way of pointing out the vast physical difference between the two, but rather add to the celebratory cheer.

The post Stephen Fry’s Toyboy Engagement appeared first on Toyboy Warehouse.

It Will Never Last!

This is one of the commonest responses to the reality of a man having any kind of relationship with a considerably older woman. In November 2014, I was watching the news and a piece with the wonderful Gillian Lynne DBE was featured. This lady (and she is a lady), who can only be described in superlatives, is a former ballet and jazz dancer, director and choreographer, particularly of theatre and musicals. She was the original designer of dance for the hit show ‘Cats’ and is currently working on a new version. This amazing woman is now 88 years of age, elegant, attractive, modest and incredibly, moving gracefully without any mobility aids. She has said she can never imagine giving up working, as she felt her body would stop functioning.

Why am I writing about her in this particular blog on age gap relationships? Well, what is less well known about her is that her husband, the actor Peter Land, is 27 years younger than she is. They married in 1980, when she was 54 and he was 27. How long have they been married? Almost 35 years and despite one separation after 18 years, they reunited and are still happy together. ₁ As Gillian puts it herself, “The day you can’t be bothered with sex, you’ve had it…”₂

For those who enjoy this kind of age gap relationship, here is another great role model. I’m sure this couple faced negative reaction at the time and I could place a bet on the supposition that she faced criticism from many for depriving her younger partner of all sorts of happiness.

My own parents married in the 1950s and are from very different ethnic groups and cultures, although it is my father who is the elder. They faced prejudice and expectations from what are now called ‘haters’ that their marriage would soon crumble. Replete with children and grandchildren, they are still proving all the doom-mongers wrong by heading contentedly towards their 60^th wedding anniversary.

The sad reality is that most relationships these days will not last. That some face more obstacles than others, cannot be denied, but no relationship is perfect. How does anyone know in advance which will be successful and which will not? Such concrete predictions are not possible and the value and depth of any relationship can only be demonstrated with time. After all, the only certainty about human life is its demise. Let’s take the calculated risks we need to and celebrate every day we have, investing in quality! That way, we may surprise ourselves with the longevity of our loving. If it doesn’t last, well, we should be proud of at least trying and having time together which made a difference.

In the final analysis, relationships between consenting adults are the business of nobody but the people involved.

So, a toast to Gillian Lynne and Peter Land: long may you keep living and loving! And… I can’t wait to see the new version of ‘Cats’.

1-    http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/celebritynews/my-perfect-weekend/10449074/My-perfect-weekend-Gillian-Lynne-dancer-and-choreographer.html

2-    http://www.express.co.uk/entertainment/theatre/280672/Dance-Review-I-m-85-the-day-you-can-t-be-bothered-with-sex-you-ve-had-it

The post It’ll Never Last… Or Will It? appeared first on Toyboy Warehouse.

Is this the new face of toyboys everywhere? Let’s hope not.

The red-tops and gossip mags are alight with it. It has everything; glamour (model), sex (allegedly), and sympathetic protagonists (um…)

Yup, it’s the latest lurch in Katie Price’s love life; her toyboy had an affair. With a woman almost old enough to be HER mother, let alone his.

In the kind of twist that only the modern age can provide, the former glamour model/business woman/icon of female emancipation and self-determination/encapsulation of all that’s wrong with the modern world broke the news in a typically understated manner.

Via twitter.

And this is how the world learned that Katie’s husband, Kieran Hayler (nine years her junior) had been having a ‘full blown sexual affair’ with a woman, Jane Poutney (22 years his senior).

Pretty sure that confirms Mr Hayler’s a card-carrying toyboy.

According to one of his exes, Kieran has always had a thing for older women.

“Whenever we were out we’d play a ‘who do you fancy’ game and he’d always pick  older women. He’d say Heather Locklear, Demi Moore, Liz Hurley – he really liked Liz Hurley.

“They were all older. He didn’t put Katie on the list.”

Source: The Mirror

Ever since the toyboy and cougar dating poster-children, Ashton Kutcher and Demi Moore*, parted ways, (and the whole Harry-from-One-Direction-and-some-lass-called-Flack was widely assumed to be a publicity stunt), there’s been a vacuum. A position vacant. Our go-to cultural shorthand for a man who’s a toyboy. Someone who’s proved himself experienced enough for the role.

Is Kieran Hayler the best we can do? Really?? A part-time stripper and builder who cheated on his pregnant wife?

Let’s hope not.

In fact, let’s choose our new face of toyboy and cougar dating everywhere, here and now.

He’s not an obvious choice. He’s old enough to be the peer of many women here on Toyboywarehouse. But, with a 17-year-long marriage to a woman 13 years his senior proves, he’s got the chops. As X Men: Days of Future Past proves, they’re even mutton chops.

Stand up and take your crown, Hugh Jackman. You’re the toyboy we’ve been waiting for.

*By the way, Demi, we have it on good authority Kieran will be single again very, very soon…

The post Are These The New Faces of Toyboy and Cougar Dating? appeared first on Toyboy Warehouse.

Cougar.

There, I said it. The ‘C’ word. And just like that other ‘C’ word, it has a whole lot of stigma.

As it stands, we can’t accord with the word cougar because of what we’ve been told it is: an older, sexualized, often predatory woman. Unfortunately that image was unaffected by the centuries of beautiful, capable older women who dated younger men. Instead the conversation is dominated by oppressive traditionalists wishing to demonize women for the sexuality that men openly enjoyed. The face of the ‘cougar’ is and has always been the same, the latest extreme age-gap lover or whichever celebrity is having a very public post-divorce break-down. And that label was never meant to be flattering. As long as inspirational and individual women like those of Toyboy Warehouse avoid it, it’s the only definition available.

But words are alive.

As babies learning to speak for the first time, we take the words from our parents’ mouths, repeat and memorize them. As we grow up, become children and later teenagers and adults, who we are doesn’t much resemble who we started out as. Language grows alongside us in the same way, changing its meaning to the point that it hardly means what it once did in the past. Words like ‘gay’ have undergone a whole life cycle, originally meaning ‘joyous’ in the 13^th century, it later became derisive and ‘immoral’ and now it has become the preferred alternative to ‘homosexual’. Like it or not, the word ‘cougar’ has become a part of our identity and if we don’t like the way we’re represented, we need to ask ourselves what we are doing to make this change? If we count ourselves out of the conversation the answer is nothing.

Whenever I tell people what I do for a living, the words ‘Toyboy Warehouse’ never fail to provoke an interesting response. Very early on, it met with a little criticism as I was asking mockingly ‘what would make someone decide to do that with their lives?’ I often suffer from moments of self-doubt and indecision, I hope I’m not alone in that, but my job is not something I allow myself to appear apologetic and uncertain about. It isn’t in the spirit of Toyboy Warehouse to shy away from the controversial or unusual conversations and if Toyboy Warehouse is fearless, if the women of the community in the pursuit of love are always fearless – I should not be anything else in the way I represent them. So why should the way we approach the word cougar be the one exception?

Our community gives us a unique position to challenge things together.

There is a little shock element to Toyboy Warehouse, something that can be powerful and useful. When Conchita Wurst sported a beard to the Eurovision Song Contest, she made a very strong statement about gender identity. In an interview soon after, she commented that ‘being a teenager in a small Austrian village was not fabulous. I tried to fit in and changed myself to be part of the game. I now realise I can create the game.’ We don’t need to wear a beard to make our point, but we are capable of speaking up and making an equally strong statement about the way we are labelled. We have the opportunity to catch someone a little off-guard and take control over the conversation as well as the support of each other.

Let’s be a part of the life and redemption of this word.

So where do we start with making this word our own? There are some obvious truths hiding in the label ‘cougar’. We older women satisfy that cougar-like ability to see what we want and go for it but what else can we find in this word ‘cougar’ to make it a more accurate reflection of who we are? In my opinion, it could mean alluring, powerful, dignified, intelligent, sensual and independent. I think it represents that unrestrained nature of the Toyboy Warehouse community.

I think it means fearless.

The post Don’t Fear The ‘C’ Word appeared first on Toyboy Warehouse.

Sometimes a problem pops up and it’s something you just can’t share with your family and friends. Luckily Toyboy Warehouse are giving you the chance to air your relationship worries – anonymously! – and in return you get some real, intelligent advice from our panel of male and female dating experts. Our experts are notable faces who you will recognize both from their presence on Toyboy Warehouse and their accomplishments in the world beyond. What they all share is tried and tested experience of what it’s like dating in our niche.

Four of you have already submitted your problems for the attention of the first of our female experts, the beautiful and accomplished Wendy Salisbury. All names have been changed, so don’t try to guess who this may be!

To see your questions answered in this space next time, email them to [email protected]

You asked:

I get incredibly nervous before I go on a first-date. I often start stuttering, sometimes I forget to zip my flies and once or twice I’ve even run away before she arrived. How can I have more confidence when meeting an older woman for the first time?    – Tom, 35

Wendy replied:

Hi Tom,

First dates and blind dates can be very daunting because neither of you knows what to expect.  It doesn’t matter how well you’ve got on in cyberspace… one always has more courage shielded by a screen! Physically meeting face-to-face is nerve-wracking for everyone, so you’re not alone there.

Running away is not a good idea because

a) you’ll feel guilty and

b) she’ll think she’s been stood up.  You have to tough it out if you’ve gone to the trouble of making the date in the first place. After all, what’s the worst that can happen?

If you’re not brave enough to keep the date, it’s best to say so beforehand and save her the journey.  You can always rearrange, but you’ll probably only get two shots at it.  If you’re not at the appointed place at the appointed time, your date will give up on you altogether or send you an angry message for having left her standing.  That’s a lose/lose situation whichever way you pitch it!

As for ‘wardrobe malfunctions’, ALWAYS check your flies before leaving home, in the same way that you check that you have your keys and mobile.

Once you have met, the best way to defuse any nerves is to admit to them. Remember, your date may be just as nervous as you. Smile, stand up to greet her if you’re there first and say ‘Hi! I don’t know about you, but I’m really nervous!’

Confidence needs building over time.  It’s perfectly normal to feel insecure in new situations. We’re all insecure about something: our looks, our clothes, our lack of knowledge on certain subjects.  If you get tongue-tied, take a deep breath, drop your shoulders, and pay your date a compliment. Even if it seems banal, say: ‘I like your top/dress/hair/shoes.’  That will break the ice. Then ask her about her day: how was her journey?  Did she come straight from work?

Once the conversation starts to flow, your stutter should abate and your voice should settle down.  The first drink usually helps as well!

Best of Luck!

Wendy x

You asked: 

I’ve been messaging someone on Toyboy Warehouse regularly for about three months. He’s charming, easy on the eye (in his photos at least!) and keen to meet up. The only issue is he says he is looking for something serious and while he lives in Edinburgh, I live in London. Can something long-distance work?   – Sarah, 48

Wendy replied: 

Hi Sarah,

I’m afraid that unless you have a regular rendezvous planned – every other weekend or even once a month for instance – long-distance relationships do struggle to survive.  You’re starting with a geographical challenge, although with today’s myriad methods of communication, you can at least keep in touch in many different ways.

You really need to meet first if you’re going to progress this.  The chemistry that may be present in your current contact may fly out the window the minute you set eyes on each other then the problem will no longer exist.  It’s all very well having an ‘imaginary’ boyfriend/girlfriend, but nothing beats the real thing.

Edinburgh is a long way from London so if your guy wants something serious he should probably be looking closer to home.  This may sound harsh but it is realistic.  If he’s hooked on you and it’s feasible to do, either he or you should be prepared to relocate.

So, in the first instance, MEET – even halfway? – and see if you click.  If not, nothing lost.  If so, you’ve got something to build on.

Best of luck!

Wendy x

If you’d like answers to any questions that you have, send them in to [email protected]

The post Ask Wendy: Your Relationship Problems Solved By Our Experts appeared first on Toyboy Warehouse.

So you’re a “cougar”.

Pretty cool, right? I mean, Demi Moore did it (and yeah, it didn’t work out well with Ashton, but it happens). Still, the whole world watched in awe as a hot older woman managed to snag a younger, sexy bachelor. Since then, older women dating younger men has headed toward the “mainstream” and the word “cougar” has been tossed around to and fro, in everything from everyday life to television to movies.

“Cougar dating“, love it or loathe it, is now more synonymous with “sexy” than it is with “animal,” which probably pisses off zoos no end.

Here are some tips for older women dating younger guys.

1) Ignore the haters. We all aim to lead a life without shame in it; a life where we feel free. If you’re an older, sexy woman dating a younger guy, it’s probable that you’re going to wind up hearing some fairly nasty things. Don’t let this be something that defines your relationship – enjoy it for what it is. No one can deny your feelings. No one.

2) He’s got a few tricks up his sleeves. Ladies, pay attention: just because your guy isn’t in your age bracket doesn’t mean he doesn’t have the capacity to teach you some delicious new tricks too.

3) He’s got more free time. More time with your younger guys means that ladies get more time to communicate with their partner. He’s not all caught up in work and life and stuff, so he’s able to listen to you. Bonus!

4) Remember this: maturity. Older women are able to smell bullshit a mile away, so if you’re mature dating with a younger guy, you’re going to be much more able to spot any problems coming down the line.

5) Bonus! Sex drive. Women reach their sexual peak later in life than men do, which means that a younger guy is more likely to have the same banging sex drive you do.

6) Live it up. Sure, you’re more mature and experienced, but sometimes it’s still pretty great to be able to let loose and get down and dirty! Let your younger guy remind you of the fun you should be having.

7) The future. No one wants to think about the “future” talk until they’re certain they know what they want. So it’s important to be upfront and communicate with your guy about what it is you’re looking for.

1) He’s not as experienced as you. Some people find that to be a turn-off, but most older women know that inexperience means an eagerness to learn.

9) Change of rules. Older women are used to being treated a certain way in a relationship because, well, it’s what you grew up with. However, just because your younger guy doesn’t follow the same rules doesn’t mean he’s rude. He just follows a separate set of dating rules.

What are some other things older women should keep in mind while dating younger guys?

The post 9 Rules for Dating Younger Men appeared first on Toyboy Warehouse.

What do you call a woman over 40 who’s attracted to younger guys? Yup. You’ve got it. ‘Cougar’.

I don’t know about ‘birds do it, bees do it’, but it certainly seems that an increasing number of female celebrities are doing it.

From something that once only made the lurid end of the media spectrum (“I’m 81 and my husband’s 18!”), it’s now impossible to check out a red carpet without finding a sleek and glamorous 40/50/60-something with a younger man on her arm.

From Julianne Moore to Jennifer Lopez, to the high-priestess of sex herself Madonna, to the perennial poster-child of cougars everywhere Demi Moore, those toned bodies and that expensive hair are impossible to ignore.

Also hard to ignore are the articles explaining why more and more men like older women. It’s because they’re financially sorted, fashionably sophisticated and confidently in control. Or they’re in a bar (dressed well below their age and being ‘raucous with their friends‘) with, quite frankly, little compunction in dragging you off to have their wicked way with you.

Phew.

It’s a teeny bit intimidating. It’s also a huge amount to live up to.

(And, don’t tell anyone about this, right? Because, between just you and me .. I don’t.)

(Sigh…)

OK; if you squint, I might look the part (oh, cheap box of hair dye, how I love you). And I’m wholly guilty of dressing in clothes designed for someone much, much younger (age 13-14 skinny jeans, FTW! No, wait, that’s not what they mean, is it?)

Being stereotyped as an ‘experienced, sexy, sophisticated’ older woman is .. well, let me put it this way; I’m more likely to be found lingering in a library than lounging in lingerie. My version of ‘sophisticated’ means I’ve recently stopped tucking my napkin into my neckline. And the closest I get to international travel is cruising the ‘around the world’ food aisle at Sainsbury’s.

In fact, I’m so much of a not-cougar that when I joked with a guy that he should ‘return me to the store’ and ask for a refund .. gentle reader, he actually DID that (lesson learnt: never even JOKE about that kind of sh!t, people.)

With the number of age-gap relationships increasing year-on-year, and the notion of such partnerships becoming the norm amongst us ‘civilians’, I’m planting a flag in the sand here, folks. Standing up for the quieter kitty. Yup, that’s right. Championing less claws, and more curiosity. Less cougar, and much more Felis Domesticus.

Because this lady’s feline fine about preferring younger guys. Just don’t label her as a cougar. OK?

This blog was written by a Toyboy Warehouse community member.

So are you a Cougar or a Kitty? Join in the discussion below or on our facebook page.

The post I am Cougar. Hear me… Meow? appeared first on Toyboy Warehouse.

Coronation Street’s Hazel Wilding was the epitome of the bored housewife. But when her eye fell on hunky young cab-driver Vikram Desai all that changed.

Now the affair is over at her instigation, she’s at least enjoyed the huge ego boost of knowing a man half her age wanted her to leave her husband for him. What’s more, she was in control the whole way.

And that’s what a relationship with a much-younger man does for a woman: it can provide a vital reminder that you’ve still got what it takes, maybe at a time when you were starting to doubt your attractiveness most.

Ideally, of course, most of us wouldn’t be unfaithful to enjoy an age-gap affair. These relationships shouldn’t be about hurting a third party in any way. They should be regarded as a self-indulgent treat, not a weapon.

Confidence boost

Says relationship counsellor and sex therapist Julia Cole: ‘If a woman has been through a painful break-up then it’s quite possible that her confidence and self-esteem will be boosted by going out with someone younger and livelier. Getting the attention of someone you think you’d never attract again is a marvellous feeling.
‘Often when a woman takes a younger lover it’s a bit of a ‘shoulder shrug’. She’s saying: ‘I’m not going to stay with this boy, I’m just going to have a good time and get out there because I’m bored.’

And let’s not forget the sex. For a woman in her late thirties, a lover in his twenties could be ideal if bedtime satisfaction is the aim. ‘A woman reaches her sexual peak at around 35-40. Research has also shown that older women have better sexual experiences – both during arousal and orgasm,’ says Julia.

‘From a physiological point of view, an older woman and a younger man could be a good match. He can give her the repeated stimulation that she needs; he is keen to learn and she’s happy to pass on her experience.’
If these are your reasons for taking a toyboy lover, then go for it. ‘The best attitude to have when choosing a relationship like this is: ‘It probably won’t last, but I’m going to have a really good time while it does,” says Julia.

Read more here

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