30 Dating Dilemmas in 30 Days – Liz Eiten, LMSW, CCTP
Your favourite cougar site, Toyboy Warehouse has 30 days to gather the most influential dating and relationship experts to help answer 30 dating dilemmas from real members. It’s a race against time to solve the world’s love issues, will we make it?
Tell us about yourself.
I help women who are struggling with trauma and codependency develop authenticity and confidence so they can build meaningful relationships and fulfilling lives. As a holistic psychotherapist, I incorporate mindfulness meditation and other evidence-based mind-body healing techniques to promote wellbeing. I am passionate about creating a space where women can heal from emotional wounds as opposed to just treating the symptoms.
If someone came to you for dating/relationship advice, what should they expect?
Anyone who comes into my office can expect a friendly, compassionate, and nonjudgmental environment where they can learn about themselves, psychology, biology, and the nature of relationships.
What are some of the projects you’re currently working on?
This year, I opened my group practice, Boketto Center, which specializes in holistic, evidence-based mental wellness. We now know that nurturing our mind improves our overall health by reducing stress and inflammation in the body, which lowers the risk of disease. I opened Boketto Center so women would have access to services that help them connect their mind and body for whole-body healing.
“My ex won’t give me a second chance. How do I convince him to take me back?”
You should respect your ex’s boundaries. It would be helpful to ask yourself why you want to be with someone who does not want to be with you. Understanding your intentions could be an opportunity to learn more about how you approach relationships.
“I’ve had two separate women tell me I’m terrible in bed (like really bad). It’s freaked me out so much that I haven’t had sex since. Should I just give up and join a monastery?”
Good sex is subjective. Now is an excellent time to learn more about what you and your partner(s) enjoy. Use your curiosity to find out about your partner’s likes, dislikes, and fantasies. Having these types of conversations prior and while having sex will make sure everyone is enjoying themselves.
“I have been dating a woman for three months, but I never told her I am separated but still married. She has her suspicions and has been hinting that she knows. How do I tell her without angering her because I did not tell her from the beginning.”
It would be essential to own your secretive behavior and explain the reasons why you have kept this from her. You can’t control her emotions, but you can be empathetic and understanding of her response. Being truthful and accepting of your partner’s response is honoring and respecting her feelings and the relationship. Having difficult conversations is vital for growth in any relationship.